#3 Mistakes When Dealing With Abuse | Abuse Allies with Danielle Esplin Podcast

Updated: Aug 8, 2019

Do you feel like no matter what you do the situation seems to escalate when in an argument with someone abusive? Have you ever tried to reason with an abusive person, hoping they would understand your point of view? This episode will help those in toxic environments navigate their way when in the midst of an argument or abusive encounter.

A lot of people want to know what to do when in an abusive relationship, but hardly do we hear someone ask what they should try to avoid. This episode with Danielle Esplin will touch on the biggest mistakes made by those who find themselves in an abusive situation.

It's imperative to know that no one can cause abuse but the abuser him/herself. This episode discusses tips and helpful pointers so that you can look after yourself, be safe, and that you can navigate your way out of the toxic environment.

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In this episode, we discuss the following:

[00:00] Intro: Mistakes dealing with abuse

[00:31] Abuse is not your fault.

[01:05] Subtle behaviors of an abuser

[03:05] Mistake 1: Pleading

[04:32] Mistake 2: Self Blame

[05:58] Abuser’s logic

[06:20] Mistake 3: Appeasement

[07:10] Mistake 4: Denial

[09:13] Mistake 5: Explaining and Defending

[10:05] Mistake 6: Withdrawal

[11:10] Mistake 7: Reacting immediately

[11:49] Mistake 8: Romanticizing Abuse

[13:19] A Quick Recap

[13:36] What you should do — Stopping the abuse

[14:52] Setting boundaries and Disengaging

[15:5] Planning to leave the abusive relationship

[16:16] The Gray Rock Method

[17:07] Outro

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